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As he staggered with rum-befuddled steps toward the dunny, the Cooper’s magnificent Rhode Island Red rooster chose that moment to wake the world. Standing on the fence that separate the two properties and stretching himself up to his full height, and with his neck arched, he began his wake up call. He had got as far as ‘Cock-a- doo.’ When Uncle Fred’s hand grabbed him by the neck and with a swift twist the rooster’s voice was cut off mid-call. While Fred denied any knowledge of the bird’s demise, he was heard to admit in private that the ‘damned bird did taste nice’. (In those days the dunny, as toilets were known, was a weatherboard construction in the farthest corner of the block. It sat over a ‘long drop’, a deep hole into which the waste products dropped a good twelve feet before combining with previous droppings. For the purpose of cleaning the nether regions a thick bundle of newspaper squares held together by a piece of string passed through a hole in one corner and looped. Foster, turning to Uncle Joe with a puzzled look on her face. Uncle Joe sat bolt upright on his chair, leaned forward, and put his right hand up to his forehead, looking somewhat surprised. “I’m terribly sorry”, he said, “I must have mixed up the boxes. That was supposed to be for my sweetheart.” Everybody laughed at what had just happened, whereas I felt confused. On the one hand, I was relieved that Uncle Joe hadn’t deliberately given me the lingerie, but on the other I was sad that I would have to give it back. I had already formed thoughts about wearing it in my room later that evening. It had been a long time since I’d enjoyed that delicate feeling of being feminine. “Good God, man”, exclaimed Mr. Green to Uncle Joe, “He’s not a Sissy boy you know.” “Indeed, not one of those transvestite types you see on television these days”, Mr. Foster guffawed. “Stop it.”, said Mrs. Green, “He’s a very sweet boy.” “Yes, but not that sweet” said Mrs. Foster, winking at me. They all.
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